Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Introduction to the Rats
This blog tracks the hilarious escapades of one of the most perennially horrible professional sports teams: The Pittsburgh Pirates. Some people like to call them the Bad News Bucs; I prefer "The Rats," derived from "Pirates." Get it? One thing everyone agrees on calling them, though, is bad.
The Pirates have the ability to take formerly talented players and turn them into complete failures. For example, just a few years ago, the Pirates acquired Kenny Lofton and Reggie Sanders, two fairly competent baseball players. During their tenure as Pirates, however, they just mixed in with the nameless rabble of bargain-basement baseballers who inhabit the Pittsburgh dugout.
This ability of the Pirates to drain their players of talent is visible again this year, the 2006 season. The Pittsburgh management raised the total payroll of the team this year by over $14 million and brought in some fairly dependable players, the most expensive of which being Jeromy Burnitz, Sean Casey and Joe Randa. Casey was promptly placed on the DL, just a few weeks after the start of the season, when he sustained a fracture in his back. Joe Randa is also sidelined, due to a foot injury. Despite his several million dollar price tag, it is unlikely that he will get the starting third base job back any time soon: the considerably less expensive Freddy Sanchez has proven himself to be the most dependable bat in the Pirates’ roster and is currently batting over .300. The most miserable disappointment of the year, however, must be Jeromy Burnitz. The outfielder is languishing at the .200 line, having spent several weeks hovering at .180. So far, he even seems unable to predict how a hit off the outfield wall will bounce back, which strikes me as fairly basic outfielder instinct.
The most frustrating thing about the Pirates is how many of their players perform once they leave the team. Barry Bonds and Bobby Bonilla, players from the last truly respectable Pirates lineup, went on to be stars. More recently, several players who underachieved on the Pirates roster have become assets to their respective teams after leaving Pittsburgh. These include the Cubs’ Aramis Ramirez, the Devil Rays’ Ty Wigginton and the White Sox' Rob Mackowiak.
Even so, Pittsburghers can’t help but cheer for their baseball team. There is something endearing about the continued failure of the city’s only baseball team. Anybody can cheer for the Yankees, but it takes a true fan to stay loyal to the Pirates. Fans of teams in the same league as the Pirates, like the Los Angeles Clippers, know that it’s even more satisfying when their team scrapes together one of those elusive wins. Of course, even the Clippers have had a marginally successful season recently.
The Pirates have the ability to take formerly talented players and turn them into complete failures. For example, just a few years ago, the Pirates acquired Kenny Lofton and Reggie Sanders, two fairly competent baseball players. During their tenure as Pirates, however, they just mixed in with the nameless rabble of bargain-basement baseballers who inhabit the Pittsburgh dugout.
This ability of the Pirates to drain their players of talent is visible again this year, the 2006 season. The Pittsburgh management raised the total payroll of the team this year by over $14 million and brought in some fairly dependable players, the most expensive of which being Jeromy Burnitz, Sean Casey and Joe Randa. Casey was promptly placed on the DL, just a few weeks after the start of the season, when he sustained a fracture in his back. Joe Randa is also sidelined, due to a foot injury. Despite his several million dollar price tag, it is unlikely that he will get the starting third base job back any time soon: the considerably less expensive Freddy Sanchez has proven himself to be the most dependable bat in the Pirates’ roster and is currently batting over .300. The most miserable disappointment of the year, however, must be Jeromy Burnitz. The outfielder is languishing at the .200 line, having spent several weeks hovering at .180. So far, he even seems unable to predict how a hit off the outfield wall will bounce back, which strikes me as fairly basic outfielder instinct.
The most frustrating thing about the Pirates is how many of their players perform once they leave the team. Barry Bonds and Bobby Bonilla, players from the last truly respectable Pirates lineup, went on to be stars. More recently, several players who underachieved on the Pirates roster have become assets to their respective teams after leaving Pittsburgh. These include the Cubs’ Aramis Ramirez, the Devil Rays’ Ty Wigginton and the White Sox' Rob Mackowiak.
Even so, Pittsburghers can’t help but cheer for their baseball team. There is something endearing about the continued failure of the city’s only baseball team. Anybody can cheer for the Yankees, but it takes a true fan to stay loyal to the Pirates. Fans of teams in the same league as the Pirates, like the Los Angeles Clippers, know that it’s even more satisfying when their team scrapes together one of those elusive wins. Of course, even the Clippers have had a marginally successful season recently.
# posted by Andrew Steadman @ 5:01 PM 
